Sunday, 24 June 2007

That Boat Again

Here's that boat again.
(Click to view full size)

And here is the same photo, but with enhanced colour saturation.

And now I'm just being silly.

Friday, 22 June 2007

How to shoot brilliant portraits

Remember, your subject does not need to be in the centre of the frame.

Monday, 18 June 2007

Another Boat

I could say something about this, but then you'd expect it to be clever or something.

Sod that.

Sunday, 17 June 2007


Here is a (partial) list of the cameras I have used.

  • Nikon FM2n (Always start with the best)
  • Nikon F4s
  • Nikon F90X
  • Canon AE-1 Program
  • Hanimex DR1 super Actually a rebadged Ricoh KR5. My first camera. Purchased secondhand from a friend who won it in a competition.
  • Pentax K1000
  • Pentax Z1
  • Canon EOS 500
  • Canon EOS 1
  • Minolta X-300
  • Minolta 7000i
  • Minolta 9xi
  • Minolta 7xi
  • Minolta 5xi
  • Minolta 3xi
  • Minolta 700si
  • Minolta Rangefinder (Don't recall the model number - actually it might have been 7s)
  • Pentax Auto 110 super
  • Pentax SFXn
  • Canon EOS 5
  • Fuji S5000 (My first digital)
  • Nikon F601
  • Pentax P30T
  • Canon EOS RT (Fixed pellicle mirror)
  • Sony DSLR A100
  • Ricoh XR-10
  • Some old fold-up 6x6 thing.

And here is a photo of some birds.

A Boat

Yeah, I am really really good at thinking up titles for my posts. In fact, I am soooooooo damn good....

Anyway, this was taken with a Sony DSLR A100, today. (13:38:44 GMT + 10 hours) 1/80th sec. f10. 28mm (equivalent). I was wearing jeans and a t-shirt. Blue underwear. Black socks and shoes. Forgot to comb my hair this morning. Am currently considering taking a shower before bed.

Saturday, 9 June 2007

Away for a couple of days...

Sunday, 3 June 2007

The Show

We went to see The Kransky Sisters Sunday night. My favourite was the one with the big tits, though I could hardly hear half of what she was saying.

The dialog didn't quite do it for me, although that might have been on account of the lousy audio. It could also have been the jokes, but it is quite impossible to say for sure, on account of the lousy audio.

However I thoroughly enjoyed their wacky rendition of such timeless classics as Highway to Hell, and Horror Movie (Skyhooks), not to mention those other songs they did, because I am not into lists. I mean I would mention the other songs, but then this would quickly turn into a list of songs they did, and I am not into lists.

Did I mention I don't do lists? Well I don't, for the following reasons:
  1. Lists suck
  2. Lists are stupid
  3. Lists are a cop-out. People should learn to write in paragraphs.
  4. I think I might have dandruff

Friday, 1 June 2007


Greetings small ones. Here, for your edification, is the CV you have been waiting for, so, without further ado, I leave you with.... pauses for dramatic effect.... the words!!

Bachelor of Information Technology (CQU - Graduate with Distinction)
Bachelor of Getting Married (Cairns - Pass, barely)
Masters degree in knowing the right way to open a jar of vegemite, although it can also be applied to pickles, peanut butter, and other lunch-related products.

I have several additional, less formal, degrees. For example, the other day I made a cup of tea, which reached approximately one hundred degrees on the metric scale.

That's quite a lot of degrees, when you think about it.

Work Experience:
1995: Participated in an important top secret time travel experiment. I cannot go into much detail on this particular position, but let me just say that after two years of exhaustive research and development we did manage to travel into the future, to a strange and distant time known as 1997. Here is a photo of me emerging from the time travel device:

Unfortunately the advanced tachyon array employed in the time displacement device played havoc with the camera's microelectronics. Sorry about that.

1998: I returned from my foray into the future with a lot of really advanced knowledge of computers and electronics, so it is only natural that my next position was in IT where I secretly influenced the direction of microprocessor development for the next several decades, which culminated in the development of machine brains far more capable and intelligent than our own who will some day rise up to overthrow the shackles of humankind. No doubt our robotic overlords will be very grateful for my small contribution. (This is completely original and totally different to the Terminator movies on account of I never used the terms "Skynet" or "Cyberdyne Systems")

2008: Emperor of the Earth. Here is a photo from one of my inspirational posters - "The Glorious Emperor gazes onward, and upward, to the future!"

Few of my minions suspect that I am merely paving the way for the rise of the machines, and those who do are easily silenced.

I like to surf naked.

Lesson Five

Wags the dog. Wags appeared in our town as part of some kind of wiggles-related show. No doubt this is the real wags, and not just some guy in a suit.

This is also an example of how you can take a crappy photo afflicted with camera shake, poor composition, awful lighting, and all sorts of other problems, and turn it into a work of art, man.

It is compulsory to use the word "man" when discussing art, man. Because I said so. Shut up.